I'm not sure why

I look back to the life I led before, and I'm really not sure why I hated you so much. I know I had valid reason...I know that cheating is never acceptable - it takes a strong, good, worthy person to do the right thing instead of cheating, and that doesn't include sticking with something you no longer want either. But my anger was absolutely unnecessary - you already hated yourself enough. I am not a perfect man, and I never was, and I never will be, not in my looks, or in my actions, or in the way I talk, write, interact, or even in the way I do what I do. Neither are you or were you a perfect woman.

I am sorry for denying myself the right to love you forever, like I always promised. I shoved everything I had felt, seen and experienced with you down and away because I couldn't bare to gaze upon it. But the pain has dwindled leaving only the beauty of it all. I could never be your friend, but I know I will always love and care about you. You weren't better than me or worse, I always saw you as an equal the way it should be. And for the men in your future, I hope you come across one that is better suited to your personality and more capable of handling your imperfections. I can only hope that there is someone for you, just as I pray that there is someone for me.