(no subject)

Just a bit of drunken merriment last night, I guess there are advantages to cyber school I always seem to forget about when I consider how it compares to normal school. Supposedly one of my friends is buying an eighth of shrooms fpr our three person group, and we're going to be having a little trip party at some point in the near future. I'd prefer not to do it in a party sense, so I won't, I'll just be off in my own little world most of the time. I'm slightly worried about the one that hasn't done them before...he's a bit of a strange kid, I just hope he handles them the right way. Also worried about the fact I offered my place up for doing it...it would be nice to do it here since I've done it here before, granted, but the fact is I need to take into consideration if someone bad trips (the chance being slim, so what) will we be able to control em' so they don't wake anybody up while we are doing this. That's about the only problem with the whole thing.

This whole thing comes about because the one friend who is getting them got some for free at a party last weekend, and tripped like hell...got offered a deal from a good friend for an eighth, and obviously wanted to do it again. I don't approve of him wanting to do them again so soon, but it's his life...none of these guys see things the way I do when it comes to the more mystic side of things, but I guess most people don't...it's hard to find anyone these days who really understands. It's been nearly a three months since I tripped I'm pretty sure, and I already said I wouldn't mind doing it 1 to 4 times a year, but that's it...no more, ever. I won't use them just to get messed up.

However, that's the common mindset around here. Bah, where have all the mystical people vanished to.

(no subject)

I got a B average for my Philosophy/Logic course and an A on my final. I missed getting an A for the course overall by about two points on the final, which really blows, but a B is good enough I guess.

Now I gotta work my ass off on my other courses. Grr.

(no subject)

Lots of contemplation.
I realize now, after all of this time, the main reason I had a problem getting over cass was that I didn't understand the simple one-word question...Why.

I still don't, but now I can put it behind me. She showed so much care and love and suddenly smash...it was all shattered without a word as she dissipated into nothingness in the masses of people that live. As if she never felt a single thing for me. That's why I had so much of a problem. I guess it must be really hard for me to understand people that totally contradict like that...but it was all a guise anyway I take it.

Beyond that, I consider the PSSAs tomorrow and many other things. As soon as I get a license ...things are going to change. Big time. I'm going to have a job, going to be able to meet people without needing to rely on other's for rides and shit as that. Going to be able to get what i want when i want it with cash inflow...I just can't wait. Life has been so dull, this year and the next should just totally blow my mind away.

I consider the fact that really, I don't have anybody I connect with anymore other than my cousin. None of my friends understand most of my points of view, they are honestly close-minded it seems like a lot of times...but then again, they have been my friends since i was a little kid. Loyalty like that is something you only get from friends you've had since childhood. Loyalty where no matter how much any of you change...you still can hang out and have tons of fun together. A strange thing indeed.

After these PSSAs are out of the way, it is smooth sailing for the most part. Finish up biology and geometry, read two more novels, do driver's ed and i'm DONE. Yes, i cannot wait. I get free college courses next year too.

Everything is finally looking up.