I'm exhausted.
Thoroughly...
I talked to veronica on the phone for probably two hours today...hehe...her dad kinda forced us to get off...
I dunno anymore...I'm happy you know...but at the same time down...
It's like, I take a look at this whole deal with cass, and all i see is lies and deceit. That's it.
She never goes up to the rink. ever. according to everyone i have talked to.
But somehow...someway...she shoes up on the exact day i go there for the first time...it just makes no sense...
I worry that maybe she's sucking the life from me...never trust a psy vamp...
I mean, damn...she stopped talking to me exactly as soon as she made friends and got a boyfriend in warren....
And then at the rink, she shoes up, wants to snuggle with me, and comment "don't you have a boyfriend?" and she said, "no."
What the hell...i'm being used?
I'm in so much pain right now. From everything. I don't hate this life but I don't like it either, and this hurt i'm feeling now i've never felt before..it's like i've had the whole piece i gave to her ripped away totally...there's nothing left of it...it's just eradicated and gone...
They say depressed people don't actually suicide until they are happy...pray it isn't true with me.
I don't want to feel down anymore. I don't want to be hurt anymore, or shredded to pieces...I don't want cass to lie to me anymore. I don't want her to hug me if she doesn't mean it, I don't want her to be around me if she doesn't mean it...why can't I just be...left unhurt...
Thoroughly...
I talked to veronica on the phone for probably two hours today...hehe...her dad kinda forced us to get off...
I dunno anymore...I'm happy you know...but at the same time down...
It's like, I take a look at this whole deal with cass, and all i see is lies and deceit. That's it.
She never goes up to the rink. ever. according to everyone i have talked to.
But somehow...someway...she shoes up on the exact day i go there for the first time...it just makes no sense...
I worry that maybe she's sucking the life from me...never trust a psy vamp...
I mean, damn...she stopped talking to me exactly as soon as she made friends and got a boyfriend in warren....
And then at the rink, she shoes up, wants to snuggle with me, and comment "don't you have a boyfriend?" and she said, "no."
What the hell...i'm being used?
I'm in so much pain right now. From everything. I don't hate this life but I don't like it either, and this hurt i'm feeling now i've never felt before..it's like i've had the whole piece i gave to her ripped away totally...there's nothing left of it...it's just eradicated and gone...
They say depressed people don't actually suicide until they are happy...pray it isn't true with me.
I don't want to feel down anymore. I don't want to be hurt anymore, or shredded to pieces...I don't want cass to lie to me anymore. I don't want her to hug me if she doesn't mean it, I don't want her to be around me if she doesn't mean it...why can't I just be...left unhurt...