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sathorI seem to have found focus, for the first time in a very long time. I think a few key, recent events, along with my third-eye being squeegeed by Bill Hicks and Noam Chomsky is the reason behind it.
So what, you might ask, is my focus on?
Well. Music and Academics. There's nothing else I really care about anymore. I have gifts in both worlds, I have plenty of potential, plenty of years left, and ample money to fund both pursuits (and plenty left over to get myself out of debt, and prepare myself for the return to college in a few years, unless some /decent/ college decides to give me a free ride before then.)
I have also realized something else that is key.
The reality is, most people invest in others rather than themselves.
When you purchase a college education, you might perceive it as investing in yourself...however, you are investing mostly in others. Unless you are getting college education at a greatly reduced rate, it's probably better to put it off until you can receive it at said reduced rate. You can go out and buy the whole set of books for a semester for under $500 usually, and as far as most professors go, YOU WON'T BE GETTING ANYTHING LESS FROM JUST THE BOOKS THAN YOU WOULD BOOKS+LECTURES.
Some professors are different, but hey, most of them will be residing in prestigious, expensive universities...
Gaming? That's investing in game designers and developers, story writers...
Buying music? You're mostly investing in the record labels (90+%)
That's why if I ever sell my music, no record label will be involved. Fuck them. I'll learn to produce on my own, kthx, you don't deserve to benefit from my creative energies, blood, sweat and tears. I understand that the evolution and spreading of ideas may be precluded by the visibility labels offer, but I also understand the labels are foul, blood-sucking creatures. People stumble on my music all the time. That's good enough.
Movies? ...
Books? I'm a little on the fence about this one. Books are an investment in your intellect and future as well as the writer's pocket. I try to get books for free if I can (that's when they are public domain.) When the writer is still living, I'll pay. If she or he is dead, why should I pay? This is an example of elite perpetuation and in my ideal vision of reality it does not deserve to exist. If that writer put aside money for their offspring and relatives, that is one thing. They don't deserve to continue receiving money after that author's death. We have the internet now. Make it free.
Instruments? I call that a self investment, because you are learning a skill that is both cerebral and emotionally satisfying. It's a difficult skill, so it takes lots of patience, practice, motivation, willpower...all useful things. And it gives you a mode through which you may express your emotions safely.
But what about recreation?
The way I am seeing it now, is this. Music and instruments and books serve the dual purpose of being recreation as well as improving your own talents and intelligence. They serve as a time sink, like everything else does, except that they have lasting benefits. There are studies that talk about gaming and how it improves problem solving ability, but I think I've done enough of that to last me a lifetime already. I'd rather read a book on formal logic. I'd rather get my intellect to the point where I can honestly sit in discussion with people and have an impact (and if I do that already, which I believe that I do, then I would like to heighten that capacity.)
And hey, don't you think learning an instrument improves problem solving ability? I think the reality is, gaming improves problem solving because you are learning an alien system in which you operate. It's not an improvement unique to gaming. There are systems for various academic disciplines, and systems for music. No difference, only being incredible at a game is unlikely to provide you (and others) with lasting enjoyment for a lifetime. Games come and go in this day and age.
The purchases:
The next week or two includes the following purchases:
Diploma ($1,102)
Loans ($87.67) - Minimum payment this month, to make way for other things.
88-Key Graded Hammer Action M-Audio Midi-Controller Keyboard ($400)
Acoustic or Electric Guitar (I haven't decided, but I'll have both sooner or later) ($200-400)
Electric Bass ($200-400)
Pro Tools ($300)
If you are wondering, I don't need an amp yet. I have a preamp that connects to my sound card. I will probably get a portable PA system at some point instead, because I will almost always be routing through a computer. Yeah, that means a laptop too...but I'll need a laptop for college anyhow.
I will probably go lower-end with regards to the instruments. I don't need anything special. The differences in sounds, in my mind, are miniscule. I never understood guitarists who had multiple electric guitars. That's just rampant consumerism and a waste of money. Play one till it busts. It's a waste of natural resources, perpetuates the capitalist ideals, and it burns a hole in your pocket.
I bet you if you handed Jimi Hendrix a First Act acoustic, he could've made it sound good. I think that's basically the point I'm getting at here, although I won't be buying first act ;)
And by the way.
Sometimes I feel like I'm Buddha, walking a long dusty road and seeing the suffering of the world.
I had something interesting to say to Jenn saturday night as well, after she pretty much cried her eyes out to me about all of the shit going on between those two.
"I think Jesus is a metaphor. If you try to be like Jesus, you're going to get crucified, Jenn. I think it's that simple."
So what, you might ask, is my focus on?
Well. Music and Academics. There's nothing else I really care about anymore. I have gifts in both worlds, I have plenty of potential, plenty of years left, and ample money to fund both pursuits (and plenty left over to get myself out of debt, and prepare myself for the return to college in a few years, unless some /decent/ college decides to give me a free ride before then.)
I have also realized something else that is key.
The reality is, most people invest in others rather than themselves.
When you purchase a college education, you might perceive it as investing in yourself...however, you are investing mostly in others. Unless you are getting college education at a greatly reduced rate, it's probably better to put it off until you can receive it at said reduced rate. You can go out and buy the whole set of books for a semester for under $500 usually, and as far as most professors go, YOU WON'T BE GETTING ANYTHING LESS FROM JUST THE BOOKS THAN YOU WOULD BOOKS+LECTURES.
Some professors are different, but hey, most of them will be residing in prestigious, expensive universities...
Gaming? That's investing in game designers and developers, story writers...
Buying music? You're mostly investing in the record labels (90+%)
That's why if I ever sell my music, no record label will be involved. Fuck them. I'll learn to produce on my own, kthx, you don't deserve to benefit from my creative energies, blood, sweat and tears. I understand that the evolution and spreading of ideas may be precluded by the visibility labels offer, but I also understand the labels are foul, blood-sucking creatures. People stumble on my music all the time. That's good enough.
Movies? ...
Books? I'm a little on the fence about this one. Books are an investment in your intellect and future as well as the writer's pocket. I try to get books for free if I can (that's when they are public domain.) When the writer is still living, I'll pay. If she or he is dead, why should I pay? This is an example of elite perpetuation and in my ideal vision of reality it does not deserve to exist. If that writer put aside money for their offspring and relatives, that is one thing. They don't deserve to continue receiving money after that author's death. We have the internet now. Make it free.
Instruments? I call that a self investment, because you are learning a skill that is both cerebral and emotionally satisfying. It's a difficult skill, so it takes lots of patience, practice, motivation, willpower...all useful things. And it gives you a mode through which you may express your emotions safely.
But what about recreation?
The way I am seeing it now, is this. Music and instruments and books serve the dual purpose of being recreation as well as improving your own talents and intelligence. They serve as a time sink, like everything else does, except that they have lasting benefits. There are studies that talk about gaming and how it improves problem solving ability, but I think I've done enough of that to last me a lifetime already. I'd rather read a book on formal logic. I'd rather get my intellect to the point where I can honestly sit in discussion with people and have an impact (and if I do that already, which I believe that I do, then I would like to heighten that capacity.)
And hey, don't you think learning an instrument improves problem solving ability? I think the reality is, gaming improves problem solving because you are learning an alien system in which you operate. It's not an improvement unique to gaming. There are systems for various academic disciplines, and systems for music. No difference, only being incredible at a game is unlikely to provide you (and others) with lasting enjoyment for a lifetime. Games come and go in this day and age.
The purchases:
The next week or two includes the following purchases:
Diploma ($1,102)
Loans ($87.67) - Minimum payment this month, to make way for other things.
88-Key Graded Hammer Action M-Audio Midi-Controller Keyboard ($400)
Acoustic or Electric Guitar (I haven't decided, but I'll have both sooner or later) ($200-400)
Electric Bass ($200-400)
Pro Tools ($300)
If you are wondering, I don't need an amp yet. I have a preamp that connects to my sound card. I will probably get a portable PA system at some point instead, because I will almost always be routing through a computer. Yeah, that means a laptop too...but I'll need a laptop for college anyhow.
I will probably go lower-end with regards to the instruments. I don't need anything special. The differences in sounds, in my mind, are miniscule. I never understood guitarists who had multiple electric guitars. That's just rampant consumerism and a waste of money. Play one till it busts. It's a waste of natural resources, perpetuates the capitalist ideals, and it burns a hole in your pocket.
I bet you if you handed Jimi Hendrix a First Act acoustic, he could've made it sound good. I think that's basically the point I'm getting at here, although I won't be buying first act ;)
And by the way.
Sometimes I feel like I'm Buddha, walking a long dusty road and seeing the suffering of the world.
I had something interesting to say to Jenn saturday night as well, after she pretty much cried her eyes out to me about all of the shit going on between those two.
"I think Jesus is a metaphor. If you try to be like Jesus, you're going to get crucified, Jenn. I think it's that simple."
