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Contemplation
Stayed up till 5 AM last night doing absolutely nothing, not even sure why i stayed up. Woke up at 12:30 (thats like 7 and a half hours of sleep) and i really didnt want to wake up. But for some reason i cant sleep past 1:00 ever...
Im drawing alot now, its the only thing i can do. I have a 4 day weekend and 2 days of it are already screwed, which sucks horribly bad. Im hoping i can play 3rd Ed. tomorrow with 2 people, but i dont know if its gonna happen.
This whole deal with me not being able to do much of anything is really starting to get annoying. What people do in this town is so stupid, they either hang out on a corner all day, or party every single night. I know if i got into any group that did that kind of stuff, my life would continue to go downhill from where it currently is, even though ide be having more fun. The only choice i feel is worth it, is totally being alone i guess. I never wanted to make that choice, but i guess i must. Maybe ill find something more constructive to do with my time *hopes*. Im also finally beginning to miss the conversations i had with matt, and his sister, and everyone i ever had good conversations with. I have begun trying to find people that i can have good face to face conversations with, but it seems impossible. And i think im beginning to get back into the stage where i cut myself alot. I really hope its not happening again.
Im drawing alot now, its the only thing i can do. I have a 4 day weekend and 2 days of it are already screwed, which sucks horribly bad. Im hoping i can play 3rd Ed. tomorrow with 2 people, but i dont know if its gonna happen.
This whole deal with me not being able to do much of anything is really starting to get annoying. What people do in this town is so stupid, they either hang out on a corner all day, or party every single night. I know if i got into any group that did that kind of stuff, my life would continue to go downhill from where it currently is, even though ide be having more fun. The only choice i feel is worth it, is totally being alone i guess. I never wanted to make that choice, but i guess i must. Maybe ill find something more constructive to do with my time *hopes*. Im also finally beginning to miss the conversations i had with matt, and his sister, and everyone i ever had good conversations with. I have begun trying to find people that i can have good face to face conversations with, but it seems impossible. And i think im beginning to get back into the stage where i cut myself alot. I really hope its not happening again.