I hope you're happy.
Dec. 13th, 2002 06:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sathorSuddenly my life comes crashing down around me, no one wants to hear the story, so fuck you.
You just all ignore me, just like everyone has in the past, i get backstabbed when i'm weakest, and somehow everyone knows when that is, when i'm feeling low and vulnerable...
Oh sure, maybe some of you care. Maybe. Probably no one that's going to read this. I have a couple friends i know will always be there. Maybe. When i graduate they won't. I'll be gone, lost in this world, probably without a direction to go in, and if i do have one, i'm sure i'll go off course because i've lost all purpose.
Humanity? I hate you. You supress everyone, you try to make them like you, and if that fails you just lash out at them because they have the strength to stay an individual. There aren't a lot of individuals left. Or maybe there is. Who knows.
I could die...how many people would care? I can think of my immediate family...maybe two, three, four of my real life friends. Maybe. Online? Online is a waste...someone can disappear off the face of the net with a few keystrokes and you never get to say goodbye to them.
Fuck you the most cass, because you said we were alike and yet no, we aren't, I have the heart to try and reach people who i haven't spoken too in a long time, and it pains me greatly to know i cannot get ahold of them. You could easily reach me, but you choose not too, you won't even give me closure. You have no heart. You aren't like me.
Fuck the people that ignore me because you have no idea what you're doing. In this life currently, i no longer can please myself. I'm a dead man inside, i feel dead, and yet i can hide it and try to make others happy...my only goal left is to make others happy. And you ignore me...fuck you.
You IGNORE ME you choose to just leave me be when i'm down. And when i'm there for you when you're down, you don't want my help. I can't repay anyone like that. I can't repay the debts i surely owe to many for listening to me fucking whine and complain like the immature little fucking kid that i can be. I've never been able to deal with anything by myself, i've always needed someone to talk too. They all choose to ignore me...they all choose to just leave me be when it's really needed.
You just all ignore me, just like everyone has in the past, i get backstabbed when i'm weakest, and somehow everyone knows when that is, when i'm feeling low and vulnerable...
Oh sure, maybe some of you care. Maybe. Probably no one that's going to read this. I have a couple friends i know will always be there. Maybe. When i graduate they won't. I'll be gone, lost in this world, probably without a direction to go in, and if i do have one, i'm sure i'll go off course because i've lost all purpose.
Humanity? I hate you. You supress everyone, you try to make them like you, and if that fails you just lash out at them because they have the strength to stay an individual. There aren't a lot of individuals left. Or maybe there is. Who knows.
I could die...how many people would care? I can think of my immediate family...maybe two, three, four of my real life friends. Maybe. Online? Online is a waste...someone can disappear off the face of the net with a few keystrokes and you never get to say goodbye to them.
Fuck you the most cass, because you said we were alike and yet no, we aren't, I have the heart to try and reach people who i haven't spoken too in a long time, and it pains me greatly to know i cannot get ahold of them. You could easily reach me, but you choose not too, you won't even give me closure. You have no heart. You aren't like me.
Fuck the people that ignore me because you have no idea what you're doing. In this life currently, i no longer can please myself. I'm a dead man inside, i feel dead, and yet i can hide it and try to make others happy...my only goal left is to make others happy. And you ignore me...fuck you.
You IGNORE ME you choose to just leave me be when i'm down. And when i'm there for you when you're down, you don't want my help. I can't repay anyone like that. I can't repay the debts i surely owe to many for listening to me fucking whine and complain like the immature little fucking kid that i can be. I've never been able to deal with anything by myself, i've always needed someone to talk too. They all choose to ignore me...they all choose to just leave me be when it's really needed.
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no subject
Date: 2002-12-13 03:41 pm (UTC)Ashleigh
i know you don't care, but
Date: 2003-01-25 09:51 pm (UTC)ally