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Train got cancelled due to a spill on the tracks currently being cleaned up by HazMat. Delayed 4 hours, too late to take a train. So I'm getting driven.

I'm not going to complain about it.

I actually don't mind I had a bit more time than was expected here.

Went down to see a few more people before I leave...drank a glass of wine...enjoyed the company to a degree although as always some uncomfortable moments with these few.

I give it up, really. As I was finally leaving she kinda just held stare with my eyes for a little while. Think maybe she wanted to say something but couldn't. Ah yeah, you didn't want me...you made your decision. Or maybe I'm reading into this too much. I was stone sober, though...can't say my perception was fogged beyond what it might be when I am in such a state regularly.

I had a pretty intense thought today, though.

How about explaining my situation up until this point, but then throw an absolute smack in the face at the reader? How about twist a literary knife so quickly that they feel themselves about to vomit...have their world turned upside, their perception of the character, and of reality?

I think it would be about the only way to simulate just how fucking ridiculous my life is in some ways. Just how I've felt at times. I could never explain those feelings directly...there aren't words to evoke those feelings in someone so easily. I think I could do it in a few hundred pages though. I think I could really blow some minds.

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